You are chocolate, lots of people LOVE chocolate - I don't

I had a revelation today, a "500 Days of Summer" type revelation. 



Found at http://www.btchflcks.com/2011/08/95-minutes-of-pure-torture-500-days-of.html





I've only seen the movie once and I'd hate to give spoilers for anyone who hasn't seen, but at the end of the movie, our leading male character has a revelation.  I think that sometimes when we break up with someone our mind plays a nasty trick on us and reminds us of only the good times.  We suffer for days, maybe even weeks (but I pray to God not months) where we remember our relationship at it's best.



Found At http://www.thecinemasource.com/blog/movies/500-days-of-summer/



Anyway, during the course of the movie (again - might be spoilers) Summer tries to tell Tom that things weren't always rainbows and sunshine.  There were things about their relationship that just didn't work.  Tom is resistant to see this, but in the end he does.  In a way, it's like the Sixth Sense of dating movies.  There are clues all along the way, a truth you've chosen not to see and then suddenly in a light bulb moment you uncover the truth you already knew.

I'm not saying that my little revelation made everything magically better or anything..  It was a brief moment, but an eye opening one.  While I am fully aware that all relationships have their issues that must be worked out (or the relationship abandoned) I realized today that maybe sometimes one person can see it's not working while the other one thinks everything is going well.

There can be differences between two people, such as communication styles, sense of humor, values, etc. that can't really be overlooked.  But "in the moment" it's easy to ignore them.  These things don't make one person right or one person wrong and they don't mean that both people can't stay relatively the same and make it work...with someone else.  The worst thing about these...they are things that can't really be changed just because you want to be with someone. 

I am a storyteller - there is nothing wrong with this, many people enjoy this aspect of my personality.  But today I had the revelation that some people might not like stories.  I was thinking about it today, why a certain ex can have long conversations with someone else, but not seem to be able to have them with me.  And then I remembered a time when I was "telling a story" and he wasn't listening.  I kept thinking how I must have bored him with my communication style.  There was a Hollywood  barrage of memories of other times where I had barely noticed he wasn't very interested in my story, no matter how interesting I was making it.  But I don't know how else to communication with people.  It's one of those things that is just a part of you, something that can't change, but luckily doesn't need to be changed. 

It's a matter of mixing the right ingredients together.  I wouldn't want to be with someone who just endures the length of time from the beginning of the story until the end, because that means they are just enduring their time with me. 

I deserve better than that, they deserve better than that.  More importantly, I've had more than that...Now I just need to practice what I preach and have hope that I can have that again.